Mixed Messages

(This one cracks me up, wins “best use of mime” award!)


Actions speak louder than Words is a familiar adage, we come across it all the time—especially writers, right?


Show, don’t tell!

But I falter frequently. No, I’m not going to tattle on myself and my adverb abuse (they don’t call me Maryly for nothin’!), I’d rather discuss my failing actions.
My mixed messages.
Not when I say one thing but do another.
But when I do one thing and don’t say why.

Because I’ve done it recently, it’s bugging me and I feel the need to share—and I’m assuming too many of you will identify, either because you do it, too,  or because I’ve done it to you.

For as much as I love making cards and sending mail, I am terrible at timing.
Like birthdays.

I love mail!
I love birthdays!
We’ve had this discussion. I may send you five (or fifteen) cards a year, but somehow, I always seem to miss your birthday.
I used to be very good at recalling names, dates, places.
Over time my brain swelled with too many new additions and flooded my mental storage facility. I may not recall like I used to, but I slosh when I shake my head.
Facebook lets me know that today is your birthday—but damn, now the card will be late.
Can we just consider the previous fifteen (or fifty) cards as acknowledgement of your big day? I think a Tuesday three weeks in advance counts!

But I can see where this might send a mixed message.

I also have an issue with identifying some of the stuff I mail. Oftentimes I am SO EXCITED about what I’m shoving in the envelope that I forget to say, Hello! Love, Mary.
I get so caught up in whatever it is that I can’t wait to send that I forget to mention why I’m sending it—or that it’s from me!

Sometimes I remember before the flap glue has dried, other times I’m able to pry open and reseal (or more likely re-envelope in an attempt to mask my shortcomings), but all too often, it’s the moment the mail leaves my fingertips into the blue box hole that I remember the post-it on the counter that says Hello! Love, Mary.

Please, for future failings, consider this my universal (invisible) message:

Again, I can see where my inactions might speak louder than my actions.
My intention is positive, but my follow through is lacking, extending a mixed message.

Thankfully I have this public forum to make amends.
To explain myself.
Of course, blogging is all so much more telling.



About Mary Fran Says

I am an artist, crafter, designer and writer. I enjoy working with mixed media-- applying visual and tactile manipulations to telling a story. Not a lot of market for that, though, :), so I'm focusing on short story submissions and novel completions. Yes, plural. Lots of beginnings, too many ideas, not enough focus.
This entry was posted in It's all about me, It's all about You, Writing and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Mixed Messages

  1. Kristin says:

    Okay, I usually remember to put a note in with my packages, newspaper clippings, etc. but why do I send the carbon copies of my checks when I pay my bills? Kinda defeats the purpose!

    Love this post and your “Dave” one!

  2. this is hysterical and I know exactly what you mean. I’m still marveling over the “woofits” definition!!!! 🙂

  3. Pingback: Christmas Letter ’17 | Mary Lamphere

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s