It’s no surprise that WORDS fascinate me.
As a writer, sure, but also as a reader–and especially as a speaker–their origins and usage are of interest.

Did you know that Merriam-Webster, America’s most trusted dictionary for English word definitions, meanings, and pronunciations since 1828, added more than 640 new words and phrases to their online dictionary in 2019?

SIX HUNDRED AND FORTY NEW ENTRIES.
The irony of having people use less words to communicate due to 140 character limitations and text abbreviations is an interesting twist considering that Tweet and BRB are now listed.

I want a piece of that dictionary real estate.

I was hanging out with a friend a while back and inquired about a mutual acquaintance. She said he was “an (effing*) donut fire”. I was unfamiliar with that phrase but I instantly liked it. And I perfectly understood how she felt about him in that moment.

To me, an (effing) donut fire describes something that should be good but just misses. Something familiar that’s become outrageous. Something that holds promise but fails in a major way.

I used the term several times during our visit, peppering the conversation with “(effing) donut fires”, warming up to it quite nicely.

Before she left, I offered a snack for the road. She declined since our mutual friend, who had quit a lucrative job and now works at a bakery, brings sweets frequently.

That’s when it hit me–DONUT FRYER.
Epic misunderstanding.
An (effing) donut fire, one might say.

In the upcoming weeks, I hope to share some stories and personal experiences I would describe as (effing) donut fires. Good times that just missed. Normal stuff with an outrageous spin. Big plans that failed ridiculously.

Merriam-Webster accepts HUNDREDS of new words and phrases each year based on usage. I guarantee there are people, places, and things in your life that make perfect (effing) donut fires.
Use it.
Let’s make it a thing.

*I don’t mean to offend, but the f-word seems to be an important part of the phrase.
We may have to settle for an Urban Dictionary entry, lol.