Heard any good jokes lately? Heard any great jokes?

What makes a joke great? I think it’s all about the context.
Who’s telling the joke, where they’re telling the joke, why they’re telling the joke, and who they’re telling the joke to.

This blog is rated D, L, S for Suggestive dialogue, Coarse language, and Sexual content. It is meant for Mature audiences only. (Okay, that may be an overstatement, but truly, I don’t want to take anyone by surprise.)

I have a friend that got married at 27. Now, 27 is a perfectly respectable age to get married. The reason it’s worth mentioning is that both she and her husband waited until they were married to have sex.

For a little perspective, let me add that two kids and 8 years into marriage, I got my tubes tied at 27.

Many years ago, this friend and I met for lunch at a busy mall restaurant. We’re laughing, chatting, catching up, when suddenly she asked me, “What’s the best thing to come out of a penis?”

I was stunned and not quite sure how to respond.

“The wrinkles,” she said quickly, cutting me off before I might actually answer.

That was the funniest joke I had ever heard.
Not because it’s the funniest joke I’d ever heard, although it is pretty clever, but because of the context of its telling. I mean, a virgin told me a dick joke. C’mon, that’s funny.

I had a similar experience this past Saturday night. My daughter and her husband gave Dave and I tickets to see the Chicago Rat Pack at the Egyptian Theater.  It was a packed house and I’m pretty sure the average age of those in attendance was a good 25 years older than we are. There was a couple there that has been married for 73 years! Do you know when Dave and I will celebrate 73 years of marriage? In the year 2059.

Early on in the show, a very drunk Dean Martin raises his glass and says, “A toast! To nipples!”

I was stunned and not sure how to respond.

“Because without nipples, breasts would have no point!” he called.

Once again, funniest joke I’d ever heard. It’s so simple, I can’t believe I’ve never heard it before, but mostly, it’s hilarious because of the context of its telling.

Jim and Dolores of the 73 year and counting wedded bliss are very likely great, great grandparents. Can you imagine saying “nipples” in front of your great, great grandparents? I mean, do great, great grandparents even know what nipples are?!

The point to all breasts.
Pah-dum-pum.
Thank you folks, I’m here every Monday. Don’t forget to tip your servers.